Lunchtime with the Bitches

This was THE funniest moment of the week – hands down. My friend, who I won’t name names but rhymes with Becky and might be short for Rebecca, and I were at lunch today in a semi-crowded restaurant downtown. While we sat there trying – mostly in vain – to enjoy our lunchtime conversation, someones phone kept ringing. At first it was merely an annoyance. But as the lunch progressed it became incessant. Think Blackberry on steroids; one little chime, like it was notifying of a new email or a text message or something equally annoying. Neither Becky or I were subtle in our annoyance and are both very vocal when the need arises or when we think the need should arise. So, we started making comments directed flippantly to the table nearest us of construction-worker types who all had phones and who all were playing with them. Never mind that the entire table was over 40, they needed to answer their damn phone or shut it the HELL up! Now mind you, these comments were delivered very passive-aggressively and not actually directed toward these men but we sure had a great time showing our truly bitchy colors. About 25 minutes later having finished lunch and gotten into the car to head back to the office when what do we hear?!? YOU GUESSED IT – the same little ring we had been bitching about! Ding… Hey Becky – IS THAT YOUR PHONE?!? It was in her pocket the whole time and she was oblivious that it was hers. We almost crashed into the two cars that had already been involved in a fender bender at the intersection we were laughing so hard! Even Becky, my bitchiest friend besides my darling sister said that she felt bad and should probably go back and apologize for being so obnoxious. Of course we didn’t but it was the thought that counts. HEY BECKY… IS THAT YOUR PHONE!?!? It still brings a chuckle…

About terraluft

Writer; wife, mother and impulsive bitch incapable of saying no. Fueled by coffee, yoga and sarcasm. View all posts by terraluft

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